“Bitterness one of the most destructive and toxic of human emotions.” – Stephen Diamond, Ph.D.,

motherhood, News, Uncategorized

Xander Ford just went missing! It caught my attention not because I am a fan or a hater. It is because I am a mother!

There was one time, I asked my sister. Kinsa gud ni si Xander Ford? Why man ni suko ang mga tao niya? My sister said, na hambugero kaayo na, laughing tan.awa gali iya mga video kato wala pa sya ng pa opera. I did not get into deeper who really he was, had no time to watch his videos and not interested in it as well. Honestly, I somehow get disappointed why there are people who choose to change their looks, but it did not reach to the point that I spent time in bashing them or draw feelings of bitterness for a day or so. It’s a waste of my time.

While I was scrolling the news on the facebook. Was so saddened by the comments of other Filipinos whose comments wanted him to die and vanish. What’s wrong with our mindset? Where are our hearts had gone? Saan po ba nangaling ang mga hugot nyo? Nawalan ba kayo ng pamilya dahil sa kanya? Nasaktan ba kayo?

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I felt sorry for this boy! This may be a gimmick or not. I felt sorry for the bitterness he has been receiving since after his surgery. I tried wearing his shoe and it’s a struggle. Struggle to get by each day trying to please others and face his bashers. I can see he’s a young man who has a weakness to reconcile and that is loving himself fully. With negative people, he is surely struggling with depression. You may not see it on his looks, on the way he talks. But, you can feel it, try opening your heart and step on his shoe.

I felt sorry for the parents and loved one who has seen and has lived with his goodness. Reading all the comments wishing him to die, mock and judged him without even knowing what was his life behind YouTube and camera. As the saying goes “you do not know how important is the person, who has become the subject of your mockery to their love once.”

Remember, he is young, his emotions are not strong as mothers or fathers. Vulnerable to your harsh words and mockery. His decisions can also be manipulated. His actions can also be dictated.

“Bitterness one of the most destructive and toxic of human emotions.” – Stephen Diamond, Ph.D., 

And as a parent of grown children of this millennium, I don’t want them to become a victim of judgment like what Xander has gone through. I don’t want to inculcate in their minds that commenting on Facebook’s without wisdom is good because that this is what they read in social media.

I encourage parents; let us be a symbol of reconciliation and love.  Simpling pindot ng ating cellphone ay maipakita natin na tayo ay mga magulang. Social media is very influential, especially to our kids. Your comments are being read by minors, your mockery and ill wishes are being read by minors, they may have thought that doing so, is just norm and fun. By these ill comments we are creating a culture of bitterness in this world, we are teaching our kids to be bitter even to the person who has not done wrong to them.

We feel sorry for those who committed suicide because of depression, but we are a contributor to depression. We hate human rights violator, but by mockery and judgment, we are being inhumane! We hate terrorists, but we terrorized him with our judgment.


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Now, look at his picture above, unmasked him as who really was “Marlou” .  Step on his shoe? Do you still hate him? Now look at yourself, feel yourself. Why you hate him that I spent negative energy on bashing him and even wished him to vanish. You know what? The answer? Maybe you have the same weakness, maybe you are insecure about his guts. What does it say? It says you also have to heal yourself and love yourself fully.

Just got this concept during my childhood self-healing and self-development seminars from our church where Father Chito has served and also has been a victim of your false judgment. I can still remember this concept because it helped me a lot to love myself and accept as who I am. Being positive and draw positive emotions to others in return. From these seminars I learned and heard testimonies of broken people because of destructive words, and healing cannot be processed by a wink of an eye! Others take a year or so to fully accept themselves. Now go back to “Marlou” do you think he has no struggles?

If you have nothing to say good about this post! Don’t post here. Say it to yourself, get a piece of paper and write it down; have a me time instead. I don’t want to add more negative energy to this post. If you have an argument, I have no time for it as well. Find people who can argue with you.

Christmas is coming let us be positive!!! Ring positive bells in our hearts and in our thoughts. Blink our values for the deteriorating values and insensitiveness in this world.



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